Stages of Mourning

stages of mourning

What are the phases of Jewish mourning?

1. Aninut – The period from the time of death until the burial.
2. Shiva – The first seven days of mourning, beginning with the day of burial as day one.
3. Sheloshim – The thirty-day mourning period starting from the burial, which includes the seven days of shiva; this is the full mourning period for all relatives except a parent.
4. Yud-Bet Chodesh – Often called the “year of mourning,” this period lasts twelve Hebrew months following the death and applies specifically to the loss of a parent.
5. Yahrzeit – The annual commemoration of the deceased, observed on the anniversary of the death according to the Jewish calendar.

What does Aninut mean?

Aninut, a Hebrew term meaning “deep sorrow,” refers to the period of mourning between the time of death and the burial. During this time, a person who has lost a loved one is called an Onen.

Responsibilities of an Onen

In Jewish tradition, the profound grief and shock of loss are acknowledged and honored. As a result, an Onen is generally excused from performing positive religious duties, such as reciting the Shema or wearing Tefillin, with the exception of observing Shabbat.

Even close friends are traditionally advised not to offer condolences during this period. Comforting words are typically reserved for after the burial, when friends and family may say: “May the Almighty comfort you among all the other mourners of Zion and Jerusalem.”

What is Avelut?

Avelut, a Hebrew term meaning “lamenting,” describes the period of mourning after the burial. A person observing this period is called an avel. Following the initial stage of Aninut, Avelut includes the customs of Shiva (seven days), Sheloshim (thirty days), and, in the case of a parent’s passing, extends through the full twelve-month mourning period.